I can remember how scared I was when I first found out that I had Lyme disease. I felt completely alone and horrified. I felt that no one understood me.
I felt suicidal when I realized it would be with me for life. That the life I knew I had before was gone, and that I'd never be the same again.
When I contracted Lyme from two ticks when hiking, I was 27 years old. I was the happiest I had ever been in my entire life. I felt like everything had been taken away from me, and during treatment I fell into a state of deep Nihilism.
I became suicidal during treatment, for as we all know, the treatment is always tougher than the disease itself.
I am so incredibly grateful for the support system of friends I have, who listened to me when I needed to talk, and to all of the beautiful people in the Lyme community. I have been aided by so many. Lyme helped me to feel connected, and I learned a lesson of balance.
The greatest gift of this disease, one of many, was witnessing the true beauty of the human spirit. Compassion.
I am in remission now, my brain fully preserved, because of complete strangers who went out of their way to help someone in their same shoes. The amount of empathy I experienced was one of the greatest treasures that I will hold onto my entire life. As I write this, my entire body becomes full of emotion, and tears even come to my eyes.
These acts of compassion have urged me to continue healing some deeper wounds that are unrelated, and have compassion for myself.
As with anything, this entire ordeal was a gift and a curse rolled up into one.
I am going to quit this blog for now, but, if Lyme should ever return, than so will I.
My plans are to treat once a year for a small amount of time, to keep my bacterial load low so my immune system will not get overpowered and taken over. I will likely continue an anti inflammatory and grainless diet, and be mindful of my sugar intake and Candida balance.
Health and wellness to you Dear Reader.
Hopefully we won't have to meet again.
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